Encargado for the day

10 days ago I wrote about how terrible my boys were. I was at the point where I pretty much just wanted to leave. I was starting to feel hopeless. I have 50 boys who don't listen. There are 4 encargados including me on my team, and 4 on the other team. That means that at sometimes we have 8 people watching all 50 boys in the section, and sometimes, when others are busy, or Haley and I are doing our other jobs for the house, the boy year of service are practicing soccer for our upcoming International tournament, or something, sometimes there is only 1 encargado (usually with fewer than the 50 kids).

We have been trying the common tactics that one would instill while taking care of 50 kids.. (; We'd wait until they'd stop talking for us to start, we'd give them consequences, we'd have to yell to get their attention at times, and we all got to the point where we said "how you treat us is how we will treat you". We seemed to had exhausted all our options, and I personally was getting frustrated that I couldn't find a solution to make this work, because I usually am good at finding new ways to do something, or what not.

Here in Mexico, it is quite warm usually. The average temperature her during the middle of the day is about mid80s. We are given work polos - a different color each day, and since I'm usually so warm, I wear a tank top under my work shirt so I can take it off if I start sweating too much. Last Wednesday, one of the kids had taken my work shirt off the ground and just put it on. I told him he should do something for me, since he was now the encargado. Then the employee of the other team told him to do something because he was wearing the encargado shirt, and there was my "ah-ha".

What would happen if we made the kids who lacked the most respect in the section be encargado for the day? They get to give consequences to the others, but they also have to get the kids to listen and do what they're told. I went back and forth with the idea in my head - thinking of the possibilities, and I came to think, "This really could work", so I brought it up to my employee, and she kind of seemed interested and kind of didn't. Not wanting to overstep my boundaries, I left it alone.

This morning, I really had no desire to work, even though our kids have kind of started on the up and up (after last week, I was really hoping they couldn't get any worse, or I don't know what I would've done). I got to the section, and one of my favorites (I shouldn't have them, but I obviously do), told me someone had stolen his bow (and arrow) from his bed this morning. I told him I'd help him look for it, and he began to tell me of another kid who had told him earlier that he was going to steal it. After confronting the kid, and telling me he hadn't taken it, I said we had to go to breakfast and he started crying because he just wanted to find his bow. I said after lunch we'd check with everyone, or we could make a new one. (to which he contested that there was no possible way I could make one better than he had - he's that kind of kid. same kid who told me that I couldn't help him with his 3rd grade homework because I wouldn't understand it. took every ounce of courage to say that I was the only one in the room who had graduated college).

As he and I were walking together in the comedor (dining hall) during breakfast, he said that he thought nobody in the section should be able to go to the Haunted House next week until someone admitted they'd stolen his bow. I figured our employee should know this, so I brought him to her, and told him to suggest the idea to her. She said "Great idea, Juan*! But you do know that if no one gets to go, you're included in that, right?" He said "fair enough". So that was that. After breakfast, we got to the section, and my employee brought up the point that Juan was going to switch places with me for the day - he would be encargado, and his first punishment was going to be that no one would leave until the bow was found.

All the kids were in shock. Juan is known for constantly talking back to the encargados, yelling, not staying in his bed, not following rules, etc. How could he possibly be encargado for the day? How are they going to listen to him? He decides the activities? He decides the punishments? Nope. I was to do Juan's chores for the day, and he was to be me - check that the kids are doing chores, check that they do activities, make sure they're not fighting, etc. He took it very seriously all day, and it was wonderful. I of course stayed by his side for a lot of it (during swimming - someone had to watch them, and he wanted to play, so he let me "take the first watch", then relieved me after an hour when he was tired), to make sure that people would actually listen to him, but I spent a lot of my day saying "I'm not an encargada today - I can't help you, talk to Juan".

I asked if he wanted to help serve lunch Family style (all 600 kids pass through the same 3 lines and can sit wherever they want with whoever they want, versus in their respective sections), or if he wanted to pass through with all the kids and eat with his brothers, but he said he was encargado so he was going to help. I reminded him that encargados always ate last, standing, if there was food left, he said "no problem!". And it really was no problem for him. He helped, passed last, and didn't complain once.

It was very fun to see how he reacted to things. I'd ask a question to see what he'd say, then give him probing questions to make him think outside the box. I can tell this kid's gonna go far. Tonight during prayer, he was checking to make sure everyone's eyes were shut. I took his place on the ground, and at one point he passed by me, tapped me on the shoulder so I looked at him, just for him to tell me to close my eyes. I couldn't stop laughing.

Watching him today was by far one of my favorite days in the house. I talked with him a few months ago about Respect because he was one of the worst kids. He said all the encargados would yell at him, no one would pay attention, etc. I talked him through a lot of stuff, and realized he just needed to be heard. All 3 of his older siblings are the "perfect" ones, and he's definitely not, and I know he tries to be even more different because all he ever hears is "why can't you be more like them?" I understand why he's the way he is. I was working one on one with him for a week straight, to teach him that if he can give more respect to the encargados, that he will also receive it. It's definitely worked, but he still has his moments where I remind him, and he calms down.

I've seen the biggest change in him out of any of my kids, and days like today make me so proud. If I can feel what I felt today with kids of my own someday, I really will feel proud and like parents always say they feel. I don't have biological kids, but I have adoptive ones, and I love them all. Days like today make me want to stay, and make me so sad that I have 2 months left here.

Still gotta make all my Christmas presents and cards for my kids - gotta get going, or I definitely am going to regret this decision later. (:

*name changed for privacy

I can do this.

Today, I was in a "parent's talk" which they give to all the encargados (caretakers), and I really do like them. All together, there are about 30 of us in total on our work weekend (and 30ish on the other work weekend). I feel very comfortable around most of them; the others I just don't know well enough yet. Also, being the only one in the room who doesn't speak Spanish fluently takes a toll on my confidence levels while talking about the development of a child. I'd say I have more "book knowledge" and a lot of experience than a lot of the people in the room, but being the "American", people think because I can't speak Spanish fluently, that I don't know what I'm talking about.

During this talk today, the man in charge of the farm area, "Doc", came and gave a talk to us - to encourage our kids to come learn more about how the animals and plants around the house grow, to take advantage of the resources we have here, as well as feel encouraged to come and have a small garden for themselves and feel a sense of ownership on something in a place where you can frequently feel like 1/600+.

He then said that our jobs as caregivers to all these children is one of the most important jobs anyone could have, and while I know this, and have been reminded time and time again, I really think it is true that we don't hear it enough. I'm not saying it to have people tell me I'm a good caretaker. I'm not here for the recognition. I am aware that a lot of people could not do what I do every day, but I do not go around flaunting it in people's faces that I took care of 35 kids alone for a few hours.

I teared up and almost had to leave the room crying when Doc said that all of us encargados are very strong to put up with this (job), because lately my kids have been terrible. Downright rotten. I have 50 boys. 50 different personalities to care of every day. 50 different opportunities to teach the same lesson in multiple ways to hopefully have it stick.

I love being here, but it isn't always easy. This past weekend was one of the worst weekends I've had here. I hurt my foot playing soccer to the point where it's been difficult to walk on (let alone interact with the kids well), dropped my phone and completely shattered the screen, faced a tarantula (know how hard it is to keep 15+ 13 year old boys away from a tarantula?), and kicked 12 of my boys out of the full-house activities on Sunday because they were misbehaving so badly and making the other employees of the house mad.

Sunday night, I told my kids that days like that didn't make me want to be here. I have 3 months left, and when they act the way they do - not listening, doing the complete opposite of what I say, taking advantage of me, the list goes on. Yes, I know they are children. Yes, I know I need to let them learn. Yes, I myself need to learn how to deal with them. Yes, I know all this. I just don't want my last memories of these children to be that they annoyed me, and I didn't like them (obviously still love them).

Today was a post to say:
- I am thankful for what I have. For the strength to endure days more challenging than I ever thought I'd encounter.
- Be thankful for what you have, because someone out there has it worse (; (today, it's me (;)
- We never stop learning, and growing.
- It's okay to be wrong and admit it at times.
- Compassion is one of the best things we can give in this world.
- Big girls DO cry, Fergie (;

Thanks for the prayers (: One day at a time.

two worlds, one heart.

Recently, I went home to go to my best friends's wedding - by far one of the most beautiful weddings I've ever been to. Nice work, Jessica & Jake, all that hard work REALLY paid off (: I got to spend a weekend celebrating the love of two amazing people who really complement each other. I am so thankful you asked me to stand up by your sides when saying "I do". 

-- myself with the beautiful jessica and jake meyer at their wedding; with my other sorority sister ashley(:

After 2 fun filled days with the best bridesmaids and full wedding party ever, I returned to my parents's house to relax and do nothing (: I purposely made a point to make few to no plans while home.

I went home in July for 4 full days, and I jampacked my schedule so much that I barely had time to sleep; the power went out the night before I left so I wasn't able to upload all the songs to my phone, nor put the photos from my phone on my computer to free up space and take more while I'm down here (I have a desktop in Minnesota).

Tuesday night, I went to the Ed Sheeran Concert with my sister in Minneapolis. She was coming from school in Wisconsin, so as I'm pulling into the parking garage, she texts me the name of the pub she's sitting at waiting for me. I walk up and she says "I ordered you a Bud Light - hope that's okay". I was kind of overtaken with emotion. My sister has recently turned 21*, I haven't seen her in over a year, I was in relaxation mode (which happens like 3 times a year for a couple days), and I was just about to see Ed (: I was so excited! We had such a good time at dinner, then at the concert (: I can't wait to see her again! I'm hoping it's before her college graduation, since I won't be home for Christmas.

-- ed sheeran!

(*My sister turned 21 in August, and I was in Mexico. She left last September to study abroad in Germany, I left for Mexico in January.)

While I was home, I stopped by the Keller Williams office I worked at for 3 years, and saw a lot of people I haven't seen in months! My favorite thing to do is casually walk into somewhere, and see people's reactions - a lot of double takes (: I got to have coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks with a bunch of people, and filled my heart again with the void I was gaining from leaving this part of my life behind. 

-- BANK, as we call ourselves (bethany, brandon, anna, nate, nate, kelly)

As I was saying goodbye to my group of friends on Saturday night before finishing packing and leaving for the airport on Sunday morning at 4am (wait, I procrastinated? noo...) I just couldn't stop crying. Being home, I didn't want to come back to Mexico. I LOVE fall weather, and I did not want to stop wearing sweaters & jeans and not sweating. I love my family, and it is very difficult being away from them for a year - yes, technology helps to call and video connect, but there's just something about eating dinner with your family, or an impromptu movie watching at 11pm. I love my friends, so much. I always am either surprised by the things coming out of their mouths, or I am laughing so hard I'm crying, and getting an ab workout at the same time. I am so thankful for my friends. They're serious when needed, and always have my back 100%. The job I left was amazing, and everyone cared so much about the well being of others. To let someone leave and follow your dreams for a year, and fully support me like they have, has been amazing. I am lucky to have Keller Williams as my family as well.

On the flip side, I have learned so much here - patience, unconditional love, understanding, the value of working hard, forgiveness, letting go of grudges, how to find near many, many ways to do/explain something, how to think about WHY someone did something before getting upset, along many other things. While I am here, I get exhausted daily. I have 48 boys, aged 8-12, in 2nd-5th grade. They are the most diverse group of kids ever. They all have their own personality, and they all do things their way, which can prove to be challenging. I have kids who think they're too cool for me, and then I have kids who will not leave my side. I have kids who are so sweet that I hope they never have a girl come in and hurt them because they will be perfect boyfriends, and then I have kids who are sooo macho I can't wait for them to have a girlfriend to treat well and ground them.

-- impromptu pyramid building in the section

I think about how they all will be in 5 years, at their college graduation, as adults with their own children, and I can't help but get excited and emotional for them. I know that some will go on to college, master's degrees, doctors, politicians, professional soccer players, restaurant owners, and I also know that some of my kids will own little stores, be taxi drivers, sell food, and be completely content with it. The fun part for me is watching these kids realize their dreams, and what they're capable of. Nuestros Pequenos Hermanos teaches them that they can do anything - don't dream too small. There is a leadership program in Seattle for young adults from the 9 homes to learn English and leadership, and return to their home countries to help better where they live.

As I was crying in my car Saturday night, I realized that the reason I'm so sad is that I have my heart in two places. Since I started coming down here in 2007, I've had a small part of my heart here, which increased over time, and now I can say I have half of my heart here. But being home, and realizing all the "1st World Problems" that I had, the things I took for granted (dishwashers, and having your clothes washed and dried within 2 hours), making money, my friends and family, all had half of my heart as well. I feel at home yet a little lost in Minnesota, as I equally feel at home and a little lost in Mexico.

I am getting close to the end of my year here; I have 4 months left. I know these months will fly by SO quickly (I need to start my Christmas gifts now, since I have over 50 to make, and only 3 months to go..!), and I am realizing and becoming more okay with the fact that this chapter in my life will be closing. I will miss my children dearly, more than I can explain, but I know I can come back and visit them. It isn't goodbye, it's see you later (: Like I did to the US 8 months ago (:

i'm baaack!

i know i've been away for a bit. looking today i saw about 10 blog posts that i started and never published 😳 i will look over them, edit and publish with the original date posted. first, i started tutoring a girl who leaves for seattle on thursday for her year of studying english and leadership. i spent pretty much every break i had for 3 months looking for things to teach her, organize worksheets, and teaching class. then, we had summer for 5 weeks, where i was working every day from either 8am-5pm, or 10am-10pm. it was a bit "pesado", which means heavy, to spend all day with all my boys, then sleeping a little (not enough) just to get right back up do the day over again. it was a great time to get to know my boys better, but my sleep and well-being was put on the back burner for a bit.

now school is back in full swing, which i will continue to write about soon (promise!!). first, i thought i'd publish the post i wrote last thursday:

i will never say i know the whole story of nuestros pequeños hermanos, but i can say that every time i learn something new, i pretty much get moved to tears. 

today, i learned about the great people padre wasson's parents william and mary were. i learned that they were passionate about helping people without homes. they would frequently have father wasson when he was a child, sleep on the couch so they could let someone get a good night's sleep in his bed. from a young age, he learned to think of others first- to help them; that by just giving them a bed, you can change their life. 

they then moved to a completely different country because their son had a sickness and the climate was better here in mexico. where he then became a priest. but from such a young age he learned about sacrifice, and what it does for you and others. we learn to be appreciative of things, that the world lacks appreciation on every level (just imagine how different we'd be if we started to say one compliment every time we talked to someone), that a lot of things in this world are trivial and materialistic.

we have so much, yet want more. i think if we all started donating more - money, our time, talents - to others, we would be all happier. it doesnt take a fancy car, the newest cell phone, 40 pairs of shoes (it IS possible to live with only 3 😱) to be happy. the simplicity of life without all that is fantastic - the amount of worries you have drastically decrease when you start putting others before you pretty consistently. 

today, i also heard a story about growing bamboo. that you plant the seeds, and year after year, you cultivate the land, and you dont see any growth until after 5 years. thats a loooong time to wait for a plant to sprout. they then related this to us and our kids here. that we have to teach these kids, to nurture them. we are their parents, and a lot of time may go by before we see the changes we're planting for them. but we have to be patient, because when they do sprout, they will be beautiful.

also, i realized i only have 4 months left here. i am a very emotional person, and i am pretty sure they will go by SO quickly. i feel like i have so much left to do - so many more experiences i want to be a part of with them. i love all of my boys (48 as of friday!!!), and trying to think of leaving them is so hard. i know i can come back and visit them, but it will be different. i wish i could take them all to my house and have 48 kids (not really, but kind of). 

holy week

Mass on Palm Sunday kicked off Holy Week in the house. It was really cool - the house involved some of the older kids to participate in a reenactment of the Stations of the Cross to begin mass. It was so cool! Watching the kids with large palms, and seeing what really happened and why we're celebrating this week. 

(Beginning mass)

(First time Jesus falls)

(Processional from the school to the church)

(Getting nailed to their crosses during mass)

(A cross I found on the gate to the church when I walked by later that day)

It was such a fun experience. Every Wednesday we walk around the church and read the Stations of the Cross, but sometimes it's hard to really focus on them between making sure my boys aren't sticking twigs in other kids ears, or trying to figure out what all the Spanish says. Getting to see them acted out is wonderful - a reminder of what happened, a way to get the children involved, as well as learn in another way than just reading. 

(A crown one of my boys made from the palms)

(Creative little guys I have! All their palms had a whole lot of pieces to them!)

Holy Thursday, we had mass again outside (all week! Which was fantastic). Father washed people's feet, and children had their First Communion. It was fun to see so many children experience a sacrament. 

(Father washing the feet of various people in the house)

(The kids receiving their First Communion with their candles) 

(Some of my boys after their First Communion, and one of my Year of Service that works with me) 

Good Friday, we had mass and Father talked about sacrifice. During mass, a kid brought up a lamb, and Father motioned to kill it (it went with the story he was telling), and hearing all the gasps from the children made me laugh out loud during mass. I think he got his point across pretty well, since the children listened after that. 

Friday night, the older kids got to watch Passion of the Christ. I was so excited, since I love this movie. It really made me think about sacrifices and what it really means. We can make big sacrifices like giving up a year of our life to volunteer in a country where we feel called to go, or sacrifice the extra $5 left over at the end of the month. It is not the same for everyone, but I hope that everyone can experience sacrifice and have it mean something for them. 

(Father using a live lamb to better illustrate his story)

One of my favorite parts about this week was that the kids from the high school came for a few days. It's always fun to see them and talk to them - we get to practice their English, I can have conversations about things other than fighting and toy cars, and I get to joke with people closer to my own age. I've been building relationships with the men shown below for years, and I am so thankful I have them in my life. 

(2 years difference, and one of the funniest and sweetest kids I've ever met in my life)

(My godson and I in 2009, and this past Easter weekend)

(Also, only a 2 year difference, and one of the smartest and the most gentlemanly men I've ever met)(is gentlemanly men a thing?)

Today, we had mass at 6:30 am, and with the time change that just happened in Mexico, mass felt like 5:30. I took my phone off automatic update and changed the clock last night so I could 'win' a round of daylight savings time, but when I got up (late) at 6, and woke up the other girl who didn't need to work today, she asked if it was really 6, to which I replied of course because I was winning DST, only to find out my watch said 4, so it was realy only 5. Daylight savings time - 1, Anna - 0.

Also, one thing I can guarantee I will not miss about Mexico when I leave are the constant fireworks and parties because...life. Fireworks and music started at midnight, and went until 5:30 this morning, so sleep didn't really happen. 

Mass started at 6:30 in the dark of the morning, and ended with the sunrise, coffee (hot chocolate) and donuts for the kids (: Father gave out chocolate eggs to all the kids, and then the egg hunt began! They hide approximately 500 eggs around the house (hundreds of acres of land) and the kids look for them. They hide 4 eggs worth money, but those are obviously more difficult. 

After the egg hunt, the other volunteers with the weekend off just hung out, went to the market, went swimming (I'm getting tan!!!!!), and just relaxed. Called my parents quick, and had a nice relaxing day. 

(One of my boys with a baby bunny from the farm, the Easter baskets Emily made us filled with goodies personalized to each of us, and the other volunteers I work with that attended mass this morning☺️)

More to come soon! The kids have 2 weeks of vacation for Easter, so my schedule is different, and more exhausting, than normal. 

Do you have what it takes to be a godparent?

My goal for the month of April is to get 30 sponsors for children here. I already have received 3 in the last week, which I will not be counting towards my goal. 

To begin, I want to share some facts with you, so you can make an educated decision. For $1 a day you can provide a child with: 
• A safe and loving home
• Clean water
• Nutritious food
• Shoes and clothing
• Health care
• An education
• A brighter future

Mexico is the oldest home of all the NPH homes, and also one of the two largest. We have about 500 kids here right now, as well as about 150 in the high school, and 50 in the university. Most of them have a few sponsors, but are still looking for more. (If you would like to sponsor a child in Honduras, Guatemala, Dominican Republic, Nicaragua, El Salvador, Haiti, Peru, and Bolivia, you are welcome to!!! I just made Mexico my personal goal for the month)

As a sponsor, or godparent as we like to say, you get to build a relationship with a child that you can either choose, or have selected at random. The children range in age from about 1.5 years old up to about 28 while they're in university. Once they graduate high school, they give one year of service to the house to say thank you, or two if they want to go to university (most opt to go). 

As a Sponsor, you will receive:
• A photo of the child
• The child’s personal history
• Annual school progress reports
• Personal letters from the child
• The opportunity to visit the child at NPH
• The chance to enhance your own life by helping a child become independent and self-sufficient 
(For more information on the organization of NPH as a whole, please click here for a link to the NPHUSA website and story of how it began.)

If you sign up to become a sponsor in the month of April, I have some special things I will give to/do for you, but I'm not going to tell you what they are - you'll have to sign up to find out (: 

Another way that I would love support this month is if you are unable to donate your money, please consider sending me an email to anna.hanson26@gmail.com, and I will get you added to the mailing list for future events if you are more able to give of your time. 

Also, if you follow me on social media, I, as well as other volunteers, use the hastag #nphmexico to document our time here, as well as show some of the children doing normal children things (: check me out!

facebook: https://www.facebook.com/anna.j.hanson 

instagram: anhan26

twitter: anhan26

Check out what it's like from the child's perspective to have godparents. 

(a photo of my godson and me)

just keep swimming

i finally lost it. a month and a half with my boys, and i finally broke today. i woke up yesterday, and everything was frustrating me. i realized this and tried to change my attitude, but little things kept irritating me. i was so excited to get to do swimming tests, and take a break from my section for a bit. what a wonderful day we had to do swim tests! 75 and cloudy (: 

i got to check a kids consequence of washing uniforms today for an hour and a half. i have no idea how it took him so long. i was frustrated because he used way too much water, too much soap, and took way too long. i know they're just things, but we really dont need to waste so much water, and he wasnt listening to me about rinsing the clothes. he missed all of activity time, and everyone came back to wash their clothes, and he was still washing uniforms. at the same time, two boys were yelling at me that the other was bothering them, three were passing a ball around naked in the courtyard - not washing their clothes, one was hitting a superman toy against the steps until limbs were coming off, then responding to my question of 'what are you doing? breaking toys?' to 'no, i have 4 arms, but the other one fell off'. its things like this that make me want to cry. so cute, yet so frustrating. mom - i only hope i was this funny when i was annoying. sorry for how annoying i was, and probably how many times i made you cry. 

after cleaning the courtyard of all the soapy water that i'd rung out of pants, my shoes were completely soaked, and i just wanted to cry. i told my boss that i was gonna run to the bathroom and be right back. on my way back, i saw one of the girls i have for additional english classes on thursdays at 5, and she said 'ana, no fuiste a ingles hoy' (you didn't go to english today) and this was icing on the cake. i felt so terrible. i know its only a 30 minute class, but i know what it feels like when my students dont come to class and i felt terrible that i made my girls feel that way, too. 

as i was typing this blog post in the section today, one of the boys asked to borrow my phone and typed 'hello ana. te quiero' which means 'hello anna. i love you'. it was cute, and made me smile (:

as challenging as this can be at times, it's my job. all jobs have ups and downs, and going into this i knew this would happen. going into bedtime, i was still a little worked up, but saying goodnight to 34 boys, who pretty much all give me kisses (i'd say i leave with well over 300 goodnight kisses), i feel way better when i leave. 

the reasons that make everything better:

(as annoying as this is, still makes me laugh) 

(ill take it(: )

(reading time!!!)

cuaresma

cuaresma means lent in spanish. lent just started yesterday on ash wednesday. the thing i decided to do this year was to eat what the kids eat at every meal; i want to cut out snacking. yesterday, we started off the day with tea, then we had sopa (soup) and frijoles (beans). (the house as a whole is giving up tortillas and bread on fridays). i am so sick of beans, so i was reminded how long this lenten season, as well as this year will be, when i eat them. i am also reminded how thankful i am to have never been really, actually starving. if the kids here dont want to eat something, they dont get to eat that meal. i realized that being a picky eater is a luxury (as well as vegetarian here). today, our lunch was fish. disclaimer: theres a picture below of how the kids eat fish here. for those of us who dont like fish, they take it to a new level here. i felt like God was enjoying it today. beans yesterday, fish today. no chicken yet, but im waiting for that day! 

(so delicious. /: )

today, we woke up to pitch black dark at 5:45 am for wake up. i even woke up a little early so i could be at my section early to counter my mexico time arrivals lately*. i got to the section at 5:55 and the door was locked. i waited until 6:10 because nobody was making a sound (theyre usually all up and running around, shouting, showering), then went back to bed until 7 since i bumped into emily and she said that without power and electricity, the kids cant get up and do chores so they got to sleep in. i went back at 7am and all the kids were up and showered, screaming, etc. and ready to go. we got all ready for school and then when i had my first break i went to see if i could shower yet. no go. instead, emily and i went to get coffee since we couldnt make any here. after 2nd breakfast, thought id test my luck at showering again. no go. for some reason though, the water where we wash our clothes was working so someone suggested i fill a bucket so that if the water does come on, if im covered in soap, id be able to rinse off my body. since the shower didnt work at all, i basically gave myself a sponge bath, then washed my hair in the clothes washing sink. 

since my laundry day is friday, and i have the whole weekend off, i wanted to get my clothes washed today. i was in line to use the washing machine later today but with no power and water, had to scratch that plan. i decided to hand wash my clothes today. when i went to hang up my first sweater, i jumped a little bit and when i landed, i twisted my ankle on one of the cobblestones and landed on my other knee. worst part about it - nobody saw it, and im sure it looked funny. it hurt a lot ): ive never sprained my ankle, and i was afraid i had done that this time. i dont have time for a sprained ankle! i iced it and took ibuprofen, and sat out from soccer this afternoon ): i guess i gotta take it easy. 

(the reason i get up in the morning)

*mexico time is showing up late to everything except church, and a few appointments. i have yet to master what to arrive late to, and how late to arrive. ie) 30 minutes late to a dance class is rude, not mexico time. 

completely and perfectly and incandescently happy.

(disclaimer - internet hasnt been working well here lately, so i write but cant post everyday) 

(saturday) today i felt very lucky because i didnt have to be at my section until 830am. i figured id get to sleep in a bit more than i have lately (5:45am wakeups). i was so wonderfully awoken at 6 by dogs howling and barking their heads off (which, idk if theyre the same or different dogs, but theres a lot of barking going on as i write this too). one of my favorite things about my body is when i wake up, im awake. sooo goodbye sleeping in! 

i got to my section, kids running around, very joyful, with more energy than i could handle. we went to breakfast, did our section chores (sweep certain patios/roads near our section, rake the gardens near our section), showered the boys, and went to mass. i absolutely love going to mass here. the grounds on which the house are, are an ex-hacienda, or old sugar cane plantation. it is absolutely gorgeous, and the church is one of the buildings slightly touched up. there arent doors - just wide areas to walk into, so sometimes there are butterflies or other insects also enjoying mass with us (: 

(entrance into the chapel)

(part of their stations of the cross) 

after mass, we got to eat outside, which is wonderful. the kids get to sit with whoever they want, versus their sections. siblings eat together, novios (boyfriend/girlfriends) eat together. the energy is fun to be around (: after lunch we watched movies in our section. first one we watched was boring (cant even remember what it is now), and the boys were being boys instead of watching the movie. they were fighting, jumping around, trying to do anything to use their energy. at one point, when i was looking through their dvds, i saw they had despicable me! i said i loved that movie, and when they boys were being unruly, we changed the movie (: i asked if they wanted to watch it in english, to which they very quickly responded 'no!' good thing ive seen it so many times, so i already knew where to laugh (; 

during this time, all the boys got to enjoy their own bag of popcorn! took a little bit of time to pop 30 bags of popcorn! i also had gotten them valentines day suckers with the other volunteer in our section, and told them that to receive their valentine they had to give me a kiss on the cheek(: most of them absolutely loved it, but of course they wouldnt tell you that (; there are a few kids who would rather not have their candy than give me a kiss (reminds me of when i was little - all or nothing. if i didnt want to do it my way, i wouldnt do it at all). we settled on bear hugs and i gave them a besito (little kiss) on the cheek, and they were happy with their suckers and popcorn! 

(little goober with our valentines on his face) 

(¡provecho! means enjoy your food!! goofing off like normal) 

(rollie pollie ollies?) 

while they were watching the movie, a few of them took my phone and started playing the game 'white tiles' (which has music with it and i had no idea because i always play it on silent!). i learned that a lot of my boys are so smart and just get bored quickly. they like things that stimulate their brains, so i may be finding some fun word puzzles or something for them to work on soon! 

saturday night was a super fun night. the dinner was a special dinner where the kids got to go to different stations and pick which food they wanted! there were taquitos, sandwiches, chilequiles which is a dish thats hard to describe, fruit with chile powder (because why eat fruit normally when you can totally enflame your mouth instead?). after dinner, there was a valentines day dance (: it was fun to dance with kids of different ages, learn some traditional and fun mexican dances, and sweat my full body weight within 2 hours! 

sunday was a more relaxing day. fell asleep while the boys were watching a movie again (weird how quickly 34 9-11 year olds can wear you out), went into town with the boys and got popsicles, then we had an activity where we ran all around the grounds of the house in the middle of the day. its very warm here all the time, but at 3pm, its a lot bit warmer than normal. id say the run was about 4 miles total, and for the out of shape person that i am, it was terrible. id be running with some of the boys and theyd ask if i liked to run, and i told them that i really didnt like it at all. only while playing soccer. all day sunday, from 4-10pm, i could not cool down for the life of me. i made mac n cheese (that a past volunteer brought down while she was visiting, and i screamed with excitement), and when i was stirring the pasta, i started sweating just from the steam of the noodles. pathetic, i know. 

(provecho!)

when you work a weekend in the house, you get the following monday off. i went to sleep sunday night at 10 and woke up monday at 8. how great it felt to turn off all my alarms! i worked on some more of my job yesterday, but literally spent the day being lazy. at home, id hate myself for the day i had yesterday, but here, im okay with it! working all day friday, saturday, sunday (6am-10pm, with the kids not in school), i was excited for my break. 

i spent it inside organizing school supplies for another job i have here, as well as the additional english classes we are all teaching. i also got to help emily de-lice her head. only took a week in her section to get it! i put coconut oil in her hair, which helps the lice not attach to your hair, and then i combed her hair out for lice. i kind of felt like a hair dresser, and i liked it (: then, she even let me cut her hair after! how quickly we learn to trust each other here ☺️

(haircut day today!) a local school comes and practices on the kids. how handsome they all look today! 

(camera shy)

some things that ive been doing with the boys a lot are arm wrestling and thumb wars. im only writing this here because my boys wont ever read this, but i use all my strength and i still lose. a lot. its quite awesome. 

"don't be like the rest of them, darling"

i had a little bit of free time this morning, so i decided to sit on pinterest for a bit. came across a "if i were rich.." board. i got so sucked into the fancy cars, the dresses, the houses & floor plans (oh my heavens.) (not so much the jewelry - always been a little too gawdy for me), and then when i saw a huge walk-in closet, that was larger than our living/dining room/kitchen here, i remembered how much i don't want all this. i want a large house for a large family, but i don't want everything in it to be used with caution, or to be very expensive. i've always wanted a lot of money, but not to spend it on me. i want to spend it on others. i want to start scholarships. i want to change people's lives by donating money and things they need but can't afford.

i found this video about homelessness and i started crying while watching it. it really hit me that that's what i want to do with my life. every person has a story, whether they have a house or not. i cannot wait to get started with that chapter of my life eventually (: check out the video! http://clearmindz.blogspot.mx/2014/09/homeless-people-were-asked-to-write.html?m=1

today, while i was sitting down in the patio with the children, i really felt like this is where i'm meant to be right now. i had one kid sitting in my lap, one on either side of me because they were cold, and i couldn't think of anywhere else i'd rather be. (thinking about it now, maybe on a date with brett eldredge, but still, maybe not.)

tomorrow is valentine's day, and i'm so excited to hang out with my boys and go to the dance with them (: i can't wait to watch them put way too much gel in their hair, and try to look all cool for the girls (they're all about 10 years old). i really feel like a  mom, and i love every second of it (:

time to sleep! (:

because im happy!

i find myself frequently smiling at little things. i realized that being here, and having a dream come true, was exactly what i needed (and some r&r). i really feel called to be a mom, and right now, im fulfilling that call to 34 nine-eleven year old boys. making the decision of which section would be mine for the year was extremely difficult.

i had great experiences in all the sections, all in different areas, so it wasn't just comparing things. it was weighing pros and cons. i even told one other volunteer who was having trouble to write 

down on paper the pros and cons of the two sections she wanted, and to look at what was more important. she said if she were to do that, the decision was very easy. thanks mom for the advice - still use it when making tough decisions ☺️ 

the kids here range in age from one and a half to seventeen years of age. i got to work in kinder (the one to five year olds), and it was so fun but i was reminded that i do not have as much patience as i wish i did. i also worked with the older girls, and they were fun to joke with, but there are 90+ women in there and, while i like a challenge, the idea of creating and maintaining solid relationships with that many girls seemed like a challenge too large for one year (dear kw peeps, i know that if your dreams dont scare you, they arent big enough. however, i didnt want to take childrens' lives and relationships into a challenge i couldnt reach). i also will be leading the edge program, which is an extra religious class/gathering for older children who want to be there. therefore, i will be seeing these older girls every week (: 

today was a special day for the años de servicios (the children of the house who graduated from the high school and in turn, give back a year of service, or two if they want to go to university). they all (75 kids) got to have the day off. that left the employees and volunteers of all sections to work. there are about 20 employees here, and 9 volunteers, so we are all exhausted. we also got to serve a dinner to them as a thank you for all their hard work whenever we need them. this did mean that i got to wake up at 5:45 and make sure the kids got up, and work all the meals, help with homework, and work until they go to sleep at 7:30 tonight. i do love doing it, and after 5 days of this last week, im quite conditioned for it - doesnt make it less tiring though (: 

i love being here and seeing all 500+ kids every day. i feel a different happiness than ive felt in a long time, and while i experience struggles here, i am overall sooo excited for my year (: 

for all who read this - what more do you want to know? ☺️

important life lessons

things ive learned in the last couple days:

- what lice looks like

- how to remove lice with my fingers

- how long it takes to remove lice with my fingers

- there is a wrong way to sweep (if youd like a demonstration, just watch me sweep normally)

- hand washing clothes is hard. like. pretty difficult. especially when little kids can do it way faster and you can feel their judgy eyes watching you horribly butcher the art that is hand washing clothes. (i actually like doing laundry, but if i ever think its annoying, ill cut off my hand because im still not handwashing) 

- i have more patience for 14 less-than-5-year olds than i thought i did

- picking a section to have for the next year is way harder than i thought it'd be

- im old because my back hurts with everything i do, and none of the kids believe me when i respond that i have no kids. the young ones all think im married and have my own kids 'en mi casa' (: sorry kids! kinda wish i did, but very glad i dont, or i wouldnt be here! 

ive already started planning my return to the states for my summer break. so far it includes (maybe in this order, maybe not?):

- buffalo wild wings

- a pedicure

and thats as far as ive gotten. i cant think much past those two (;

monday i get my first break and im so excited! one, to sleep. two, to open my 2nd envelope with messages from my loved ones back home. 

(on a walk with some goofballs)

(emily and i taking our anti-parasite medication. it was precisely as delicious as it sounds) 

(the kinder section 'flying' into the farming fields this afternoon) 

here in miacatlan!!!

(: so many emotions that ive been feeling lately. 

sunday, emily, kim, julia, and i went to the movie theater in cuernavaca. we didnt know what we were going to see, but knew we wanted to go see a movie - it only costs 40 pesos, which is less than $3. (: after looking at the list of movies that were playing, we blindly chose one with a long name, and hoped for the best. it was unbroken, directed by angelina jolie. it was fascinating. so good. it really put things into perspective for me.

if you dont know the story line, an olympic runner from the 40s got in a plane crash during ww2, and was stranded in the middle of the ocean for 47 days. he experienced so much - witnessed so much death, and nearly died himself, before being taken as a POW in japan for years. it was absolutely emotional, and angelina did a wonderful job. i highly recommend everyone go see it - its worth the high US price. promise (:

i figued that if louis zamperini could survive all that and still be positive day after day - never giving up, i can definitely survive ANYTHING. and i also have no reason to complain about anything. i didnt almost get eaten by a shark today, i didnt get sunburnt by having exposed skin on a raft in the middle of the ocean for 16+ hours, and i have more than enough safe water to drink. 

last night, i got a little emotional. i was so unsure of what id be doing today when starting our rotations, and ive been missing home. (i really didnt think thatd happen so quickly since ive been wanting to come back here for soooo long!) but im missing american food, and understanding whats going on in a conversation. i have enough spanish to get by, but not for long. already made 80 notecards of verbs with emily today - goal is 500 by the end of the week (: 

i knew coming into this that it would be a job, a very fun one, but it wouldnt be easy. i feel like i have higher emotions due to so many uncertainties right now. my spanish needs improvement. i havent done laundry in almost 2 weeks. i dont think i like beans anymore - im doomed. we are doing rotations of sections right now to decide which section of kids we will take care of for the year. 

i had the section of 9-11 year old boys today, and it was so fun. i got to their section at 5:55 to be there for the (what i thought was a) 6am wakeup, but when i walked up, i could hear so much commotion from the boys in the shower. i was in awe of how much energy they had at 6 am, but they go to bed at like 7:30-8, so i understand. wish i could go to bed that early ):  

getting them dressed and ready for school was so intriguing to watch. i knew i liked to dawdle when getting dressed, but these boys take it to a new level. some were doing some of their chores at the same time (washing their floor), but it still managed to take nearly an hour and a half to get ~35 boys showered, dressed, finished with chores, and out the door for breakfast. i guess i cant be too surprised - just a change from the very quick lifestyle im used to. 

while they were in school, we went to our first junta, or staff meeting. i was so excited because i got to finally don the nph polo and be a part of the team ive wanted to be with for years. it went a little long, i was a little lost since everyone was speaking in pretty quick spanish. and the room was cold, so paired with my early morning wakeup call, staying awake was a bit of a challenge.

(standing in the patio in my polo)

(dont know why, just love this photo. better idea of my polo logo) 

after lunch with my section again, we just hung out in the section room. i was kind of confused, like, do we just sit here? one of the ladies who also works in the section said 'yup! just hang out and play with them until their next activity'. yet again, a challenge im willing to accept, i just know its going to take a while to get used to it. i even got my new polo full of hair gel. thats what i get for working with little mexican boys, who could bounce stuff off their gelled hair. 

(stealing my phone and taking selfies)

after the kids went to bed, i was walking back to volunteer housing, and saw the library was open (womanned by another volunteer), so i stopped in to grab some easy reads in spanish (i got a magic treehouse book!!! so pumped!!) as i was in there, i saw a kid ive known for a few years who is the godson of one of my good friends. he pulled out a book in english and asked me to read it to him. 

as i was sitting there reading it, and kind of feeling foolish because i was getting into reading and mildly acting things out, i got a little sad. this boy is probably 13 years old, and i dont know how often he'd been read to like this. like he just picked a book and read it to him. if i can be that same light to more kids this year, ill feel like ive done something. the kids may not remember, but i know i wont forget sitting with kids in my lap reading books. 

im so constantly reminded how simple life is here. i mean, ive known it, but to just stop and read a book, or go on a walk, hit around a volleyball? priceless and irreplaceable. one of my friends reminded me that everytime he saw me in the states, i was glued to my phone and the internet. guilty. my facebook and pinterest are individually proof enough, and collectively, embarrassingly high (i should be famous for my pinterest..)

well, i should hit the hay now. almost 11 and i get to be up before 6 again tomorrow (: thanks for reading, and thanks for the constant prayers and support! i am missing everyone from home, so please send me a photo of whats going on in your life! (: anna.hanson26@gmail.com

buenas noches a todos! 

(the very beginning of my wall - still in progress. thanks to everyone for the kind words - theyre my inspiration right now!)